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Life Without Them......

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Subject: Life Without Them......
Date: 05/07/2008

On May 18th 2008 it will be my Daddy's birthday, and 6 months and one day from the day he passed after a short 6 month battle with stomach cancer. He was only 55.  Each day presents one of two scenarios, sometimes good and sometimes bad, in dealing with the passing of my father.  Some days, I can feel the weight of depression on my soul the minute I wake up.  Nothing goes quite the way I want, my spirit is heavy, and then something reminds me of Daddy and I'm in the bathroom bawling.  Other days I think about him and all of the wonderful moments he's taken part of and created in my life, and it feels as if he's right there smiling with me. I'm not crying, I'm just thankful, for being in that moment, and being able to remember and enjoy that I experienced that.  I don't expect to ever get over this in my time here. I don't think anyone does when you lose someone you love.  But in the words of my loving Mother, I am changed forever.  We all are.  I know Earth is not where we are meant to stay.  But this is all we know here and now, and no matter how spiritual you may be, sometimes, it is hard to comprehend life without those that have impacted us so much.  I find myself fighting harder, trying to live harder, and love harder.  I still have a long way to go....  I believe in Flinstones vitamins for my son, and walks in the evening, and taking care of flowers, and appreciating every minute of it.  For all of you in my situation, trying to live life without them; the ones we love; and for those still in the battle, I send you love, and the message to love, and to love life.  It's not over when we pass on, but when we leave here, this Earth, we have only had one shot at making it good.  Make it great!! Love and hugs!!!-Tash

 

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