On 7/17/2008
kittysue wrote:
Hi,
I don't want to sadden anyone, but my dear mother passed away on June 2 from ovarian cancer- carcinoma sarcoma- which her oncloogist assures me is rare and has a 5-10% chance of genetic heredity... She was 72, a vegan (all organic) working fulltime, playing tennis 2x per week and healthier than me, her 43 year old daughter. It has been devestating, and I am trying to reach out to a woman (or someone else) who has experienced this kind of paralyzing loss..I read a sad/lovely message on this site from a daughter who expressed how she couldn't function- being outside in the sun- thinking about what her mom would be doing.... I am devestated...losing my Mom, my best friend, my compass... and doing all of the aftermath alone. Hospice has been FABULOUS, but at the end of the day, I still want my mom back. She was treated at Fox Chase Cancer Center for 16 months (she was on more trials than any of her oncologist's patients) which is irrelevant, but if you have any supportlive words, I would appreciate them. Grieving Daughter, Susan , Portland, Maine
Susan, I know your going thru a real rough time right now but would your mom want you to live your life in grief? No I am sure she wouldnt. Take the time to grieve, it's normal but keep in mind that God saw more than you and he took her for a reason at this time in her life. I lost my husband to lung cancer over a year ago and today I battle with ovarian cancer but I know that God is the decision maker and he see's more and knows more than we do....I didnt want my husband of almost 50yrs to die but I didnt want him to keep suffering and not have a quality of life either....I prayed for God to make his life a little easier even if it meant taking him....and he did. I wish I had him back but I also know he's not in pain anymore and I pretty much feel that way about myself when the day comes....I dont want to die and it scares me but I dont want to be in alot of pain and wear my family down so I leave the decision in God's hands. Think of all the good times and the memories with your mom and know she's looking down over you. I think of my husband and wish I could have him back but then I start thinking of little things he said or did or the times we laughed and it helps me to get thru the rough times.....the ole saying "time heals everything" is so very true. Grieve but give yourself time....