Hi Sinead, I hope that I caught that right as your name. I was so touched to receive your response and I am so sorry of the horrible loss that you and your family have had to go through. Being the only daughter has had to be so difficult, and the birth of your baby so close to the end of her grandpa's life on earth has to be something unbearable. I don't know how old your dad was, I guess I am curious because we were told that this cancer was very rare in a female Amanda's age, usually elderly people are hit with it...70's 80's...When I received your e-mail, I actually got chills and a sense of excitement came over me for more than one reason. Our family is partly Irish and are very proud of it...Amanda's dream was to one day go to Ireland..she and her best friend had planned on doing it this year, I believe...she had all kinds of Ireland things displayed in her room and an Irish flag on her bedroom wall...it gave me goose bumps when I found out where you were writing from...and you have been the only one to respond to me in the way you did..there is no way to describe the frustration, anguish and pain that an entire family goes through with this cancer. Don't get me wrong, none of them are any good, but to know there are no answers, no resources to check into to raise money for awareness of this cancer is as frustrating as the disease itself. I had three children and I lost my youngest to a cancer that isn't often found in young people, from what I've been told..and you lost your father...I have no idea where to begin to find out any information on this...I've searched certain websites and basicly come up with nothing but how long it takes for it to take over your body and nothing about wanting to set up away to fight it....is it because the word terminal, but hopeful is the first thing you are told so they go no further with any testing...they could have used Amanda, she had a young, healthy body, she was in the army national guard, became a cop and played soccer from the age of 6..she never smoked always took good care of herself because she was so athletic..she coached soccer at the school she graduated from as well as the one in the city that she worked as a cop...well, I'm getting off track, sorry...its just that where do they do research on carcinoma of an unknown primary? I'll bet they would love some donations if we could find them...Amanda was ready to fight this and she was ready to do anything she could to save her own life and help others that will be stricken with it...Hopefully between the two worlds we live in, we can come up with some answers..I hope I didn't go onto much, because I've really not changed anything for either of us...whats your baby's name? And where in Ireland do you live...I work with a woman thats made two or three trips there and the next time she goes she is going to take Amanda's badge from her police uniform and put it up on a pub wall wherever it is they go...I hope to hear from you again..and I hope that your family is holding onto the precious memories of your father...I was told to rejoice and be glad for the time we had Amanda with us and try not to think about how it all changed at the "end"..I don't know if you find this, but it is hard to do, even after just a year....I wish you all peace in your hearts...Lynda