Hi,
I was reading about how you suffer from anxiety due to taking scans and all related to your cancer. Honey let me tell you, I do know how you feel. I went through the same exact thing. I was 32 when I was diagnosed with stage 1 predominantly large b cell/follicular lymphoma. If I can recall that was what it was called. I'm still having anxiety attacks, I was on effexor for 7 yrs. and after relocating and starting over due to hurricane Katrina I decided to wean off of this drug. Being on that antidepressant was hard as it was, because it deprived me of sleep. I'm having to do scans all over again b/c all of my 8 yrs of scans was destroyed in the hurricane.
I just wanted to express that I do know what and how you feel. Even though I've been in remission all these years I still get really scared and anxious. The last scan I took was back in July and I just went to be scanned again today, because the new doctor where I'm living now says she saw something that was very very small near my lung, this was in July and she told me that since all of my prior scans were destroyed I had to retake scans again and she was going to compare this one to the last one and so on, she feels like it's nothing but scar tissue, or a cal deposit or something like that. . I was deeply upset not to mention anxious, also after moving into a new beautiful home, the house of my dreams with my husband and family I've just found out that he had an affair on me after living here for a few mos. My husband had a gastric bypass surgery and the weight loss went to his head and he completely forgot where he'd come from. So honey I do know, but keep your head up and always remember that someone somewhere out there always has it worst than you do.