Im so sorry that you have had to experience such grief and loss at such an early age. My cousin who is my best friend now has breast cancer that has spread to her liver. she has three young children 6,9,11. they like yourself dont realize what will happen in months or hopefully years to come. she is only 41 years old and it kills her to think of everything she will miss in her childrens lives. i have tried to get closer to her kids who will need love and attention from relatives and friends. you must always remember how much you loved your father and the memories you do have of him. you are fortunate that you have some positive feelings becuase many children never experience the love that you sound like you have received. this is something you must cherish and hold on to. that being said its ok to feel angry and sad becasue thats only natural. i too would recommend a grief groupo of children who have shared the same experience that you have. keep loving and supporting your mom so that you both witll hep each other through those tough days and years ahead. im truly so sad hearing about your experience. my thoughts and prayers go out to you.