CancerCompass message board discussion started by yosh003 on 7/17/2007 http://www.cancercompass.com/message-board/message/all,14444,0.htm Wed, 20 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT Wed, 20 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT http://backend.userland.com/rss RSS.NET: http://www.rssdotnet.com/ Hi-I am posting because my husband who resently turned 41 was diagnosed with multiple myeloma.  The diagnosis was originally missed, he went to the hospital in January and has been dialyzed for the last 7 months.  We have 3 children.  The oldest will be starting high school at the end of this month, the youngest is still in elementary school and our middle son has an autism disorder.  We have no family where we're at and havent really spoken to his in the last 15 years.  He has undergone 4 months of Thalidomide and Decadron and now they are recommending a autologous bone marrow transplant.  I am totally overwhelmed, we met with the staff from the transplant office yesterday and I can't imagine doing all that needs to be done.  For him and our children.  Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated!Thanks yosh003 Tue, 17 Jul 2007 00:00:00 GMT It sounds like this may be the last thing you want to do.....But call his family. He may not have spoken to them in years and there may be a very good reason why but he is still there son, brother, etc.Trust my boyfriend was not speaking to his parents when I met him he had been kicked out of his home when he was young and moved from his moms to his dads house. His parents hated eachother and hadnt spoken in 20 years. But when he was diagnosed with cancer he called them and now they talk together and work things out. They may be able to help with paperwork, or just visit with and take care of the kids for you.If they are truely not an option reach out to nieghbors, family friends ask for little things, like a meal, or shopping for you or few hours of some one sitting with your husband and kids so you can have time to your self. Good luck! Tooyoung22 Thu, 19 Jul 2007 00:00:00 GMT Hi. It is indeed overwhelming. I hope you will let people help you. If someone offers to do something, instead of saying no, take their phone number and tell them you'll give them a call. Make lists, but don't beat yourself up when you can't get to everything. Maybe the parents of your childrens friends can help give your children rides, or have your kids stay over now and then. Your husband may not feel like eating, but be sure you eat something anyway. Rest when you can, even if it's a short rest, it counts. If you don't take vitamins, now would be a good time to start. You'll find you are capable of far more than you ever imagined. Sputnik Tue, 24 Jul 2007 00:00:00 GMT Hi,I have found while going through the cancer ride, you need to take care of yourself.  Melatonin helps you go to sleep and gives you a good nights rest.  This is a must for the caregiver.Juice carrots, beets, and celery for your husband for energy and drink one yourself.  I have found these refreshing and uplifting. I take a good b complex vitamin, colostrum, and beta glucan to help ward off any illnesses I may catch from the kids.I try to relax and meditateI take 5 Thp or something like that for my serotonin levels.Being the caregiver for the family can take its toll.  Take whatever help is offered to you, and don't forget about yourself.  I took off for the beauty shop one night.  Something I haven't done in years, and I was looking pretty ragged.  They gave me the work-over, and I came home feeling like a million dollars, and ready to tackle whatever comes my way.  Seeing the smiles on my family's face was well worth it. I would also check out Oasis of Hope and the Gerson clinic,Lynette  Lynette524 Tue, 24 Jul 2007 00:00:00 GMT hi go with the thalidomide my husband if your husband can tolerate it My husband has had mm for 11 years he is now just finished velcade and we are awaing the results he took thalidomide for 12months but had to stop because of feet pain but he  was in remmission for 3and a half yearsthe velade has increased the pain in his feet please let me know how your husband gets onmy husband is 74 so your husband is only young He will be ok best wishes  maureen Mobil Mon, 06 Aug 2007 00:00:00 GMT