CancerCompass message board discussion started by LSUSAN on 1/8/2008 http://www.cancercompass.com/message-board/message/all,19525,0.htm Wed, 08 Oct 2008 00:00:00 GMT Wed, 08 Oct 2008 00:00:00 GMT http://backend.userland.com/rss RSS.NET: http://www.rssdotnet.com/ It seems that the only time I am at peace these days is when  I am outside running.  I breath the cool evening air into my lungs and then exhale and, for a moment, it makes me realize how truly great it is to be alive.  I see the mountains in the background as I'm coming down the hill and the beauty of the sunset sky.  When I am running I am not thinking of my father suffering and how our lives have changed so much.  When I'm running I'm not thinking of how tired and sad my poor mother must be and how I am so far away and can't be there to help them and how helpless I feel.  NO,!! when I'm running I feel peaceful and in control and since running (especially uphill) is not an easy task it does not allow my brain to think anything else except the act of running and the beautiful scenery around me.  Yes, running really allows me to stay in the moment.  Each and every day at the end of my run I feel a sense of accomplsihment and momentary peace  and I thank God for granting me the ability to be able to run for I do not know where I would be right now without it.  Unfortunately my run is over tonight and I must now face my endless thoughts of my poor father but God willing tomorrow I will be on the run again...... LSUSAN Tue, 08 Jan 2008 00:00:00 GMT L,2 things that people have written in response to me when i have posted on here is: "live in the moment"  and "don't mourn the living" these 2 comments have really gotten me through some very, very tough days when i was "mourning the living". there is a documentary that was on about 2 months ago on the TLC channel. it's called "crazy, sexy, cancer" it is very uplifting. the woman also wrote a book and it has lots of info, tips, recipes, other cancer pt's etc...it's title is the same name and the womans name is kris carr.i am so glad that you have found such a wonderful outlet. running clears the mind. we all need to have an outlet when dealing with cancer of a loved one.  i have my smiling 4yr old daughter. she clears my mind and opens my heart to shed it of it's pain.i will continue to keep you and your mom & dad in my prayers. take care & keep on running!  kris  lippygirl Wed, 09 Jan 2008 00:00:00 GMT Running and weightlifting is my outlet too.  Everyone needs to do something...otherwise you have too much time to think/dwell on negative things.  Steeda Wed, 09 Jan 2008 00:00:00 GMT Hey thanks Kris.....it's so easy to allow your feelings take over during these vulnerable times but your words that you share with me are ones of wisdom and I have been repeating them to myself all day today: "live in the moment and don't mourn the living".....so true, thanks : ) LSUSAN Wed, 09 Jan 2008 00:00:00 GMT