CancerCompass message board discussion started by mikeshan on 2/9/2008 http://www.cancercompass.com/message-board/message/all,20772,0.htm Fri, 05 Sep 2008 00:00:00 GMT Fri, 05 Sep 2008 00:00:00 GMT http://backend.userland.com/rss RSS.NET: http://www.rssdotnet.com/ hi all hope this message finds everyone as  happy as can be. All of you figthing this beast keep strong I feel for you. Alyssa and i are getting into a routine which is good. Daycare started on the 4th of feb and that was pretty hard for Dad to drop her off. I busted my ass in my business for 10 years so when Shan and i had a child she wouldnt have to work and could stay home. guess that plan went out the window... she goes mon wed and fri and on tues thurs she has playschool and my mom picks her up form there and looks after her. we are gonna go to disneyland in march ( i have no choice) Alyssa won't let it go!!!!  Oh well I am sure shann would have wanted us to go anyway. I dont know how much I will post cause I am moving on in life i am too young to be sad forever even though this board is sooooo helpful it makes me sad reading stories and stuff. I had a long two year battle with colon cancer with Shann before this esophageal cancer started. I hope you all read lots of survivor stories but I really dont feel i can comment and help as it didnt work more than 3 months for me. All I can say is.. To my Beautiful Wife:  No More Medicine    No More Pain   I Will Miss You Always & Forever     Sweet Dreams..Mikeytake care all I will check in once in a while so remember to give hugs and kisses to all of your loved ones just bec ause you never know..... I wish i would of done it more.  mikeshan Sat, 09 Feb 2008 00:00:00 GMT Mike-You and Alyssa will remain in my heart and prayers. I pray you will each be showered in blessings and healing after the ordeal you have been through. You are a kind and loving man, and I trust you will be a wonderful Dad to Alyssa through the years. I also pray she is old enough to hold on to the beautiful memories of her time with you and her Mom. I understand your need to move on to happier things, but know you will also keep each of us in your heart because we have shared this journey and you understand firsthand. I doubt that ever goes away. Enjoy all the small gifts that will come your way in raising your beautiful girl. I know you are in pain, but agree that you are too young to hold on to it all the time. You need to be able to move forward for Alyssa too. If you find you need us, we will be here. Much love and many blessings!   tongrenhealer Sat, 09 Feb 2008 00:00:00 GMT Hi Mike,      You are exactly right in moving on. Life is too short to hold on to the pain forever. Our loved ones would not want us to do that either.    I hope you and Alyssa have a great time at Disney. Somehow I just know Shan WILL be there.   I wish you peace and much joy in your life. You deserve it.                                                                                    Pat Patty5 Sat, 09 Feb 2008 00:00:00 GMT Good luck Mike!!  Stop by this site every now and then like I do.  I only come every 2-3 weeks now but something keeps pulling me back here although I recognize fewer and fewer of the members which I guess is normal.Have a great time at Disney and make memories for your daughter which she will never forget.  Shan will be there in spirit watching over the two of you.Debby Debbyw67 Sat, 09 Feb 2008 00:00:00 GMT My heart goes out to you Mike. I know how much loosing a parent hurts, I can't even imagine loosing my spouse, and becoming a single parent.  If you need any help planning your Disneyland trip send me a private message. Disneyland is my hobby (more like obsession). We take the kids at least once a year, sometimes more.  I can give you a lot of planning tips if you would like.Linda 2cats Sat, 09 Feb 2008 00:00:00 GMT