CancerCompass message board discussion started by FLgaltg on 3/21/2008 http://www.cancercompass.com/message-board/message/all,22232,0.htm Thu, 20 Nov 2008 00:00:00 GMT Thu, 20 Nov 2008 00:00:00 GMT http://backend.userland.com/rss RSS.NET: http://www.rssdotnet.com/ Am 5 months out from 6 rounds of chemo and 30 rads during April-August of 2007. Triple negative. Was very very ill, but for now, doing ok.  Still have swelling from rads and neuropathy in hands & feet from Taxotere.  Just found out husband cheated on me while I was undergoing treatment..  Have heard this is sort of a common occurence.  Just wondering how to deal.  We have split up for now. FLgaltg Fri, 21 Mar 2008 00:00:00 GMT I'm sorry for your situation.  I don't have a husband.  But, it seems like tough times should bring people closer.  If you or your husband think his actions are somehow normal, I think he needs some serious counseling.  susanah Mon, 24 Mar 2008 00:00:00 GMT So sorry to hear about your problems.  I'm a year into LIVING with a Stage IV diagnosis (was 44 when diagnosed).  Have two young kids and refuse to be beaten down.  Husband has failed me MISERABLY in providing any kind of emotional support...feels anger is the best way to deal.  It is sad, but right now I feel like I can fight cancer or I can fight him, so I choose to fight cancer and I will deal with him later.  Be strong and lean on the people you CAN depend upon. Peace~ beachbabe Fri, 28 Mar 2008 00:00:00 GMT I am so sorry that you have to deal with an unfaithful husband and Cancer too. Life seems so unfair!! I am going through the death of my husband on 9/11/2007 and dx'ed with Breast Cancer in Dec. 2007. Had surgery Jan. 11,2008. So I understand what it's like to go through this alone. The only thing that keeps me going is my Trust in God!! I could never make it without prayer and all the people that is praying for me . My two daughters are standing beside me and doing what they can but they both live in different states and can't be with me much.I am taking Arimidex taht makes my bones hurt bad. And many more side effects .Take care and I will be praying for you.Hugs Shirley ShirleyM Fri, 28 Mar 2008 00:00:00 GMT I'm so sorry you have to face this double whammy.This happened to me last year. My husband returned from the UK (we live in New Zealand) for the operation but then left me again and returned to his lover. It is devastating - especially after 35 years together, but right now your health is the most important thing to concentrate on. you deserve to treat yourself well, be selfish, try not to concern yourself with him. Surround yourself with the most supportive, positive people you can find. Go out and have fun - live life to the full every day. If it's becoming too much of a strain then see your doctor or a counsellor. Whatever happens in the future with your husband, you deserve the best. This is no time to short-change yourself. I wish you all the very best and I hope your husband comes to his senses. Smort9256 Sat, 29 Mar 2008 00:00:00 GMT Your message has a recurring theme in my life.  My fiance was diagnosed with stage three breast cancer on Valentine's Day 2007.  She was pregnant with our daughter and facing the reality of not being there for Kendyl.  Planning, or should I say expecting to be a part of her support group, she informed me on the way to her third chemo treatment that she was calling of the engagement.  Stating that she no longer had the capacity or desire to be in a romantic relationship.  Since we severed ties, her anger and bitterness has been bestowed on me.   I am her punching bag and the situation is only getting worse.  Attempts to reconcile have been futile and the desire to move is becoming omnipotent.  However, feelings of guilt penetrate my heart when the opportunity to date resurfaces.  Inferior thoughts of betrayal and insensitivity have caused me to pause.  Should I continue to hesitate or come to the realization that all thing must pass? David  Davidb520 Mon, 14 Apr 2008 00:00:00 GMT