CancerCompass message board discussion started by lowrider on 7/1/2008 http://www.cancercompass.com/message-board/message/all,25592,0.htm Sun, 23 Nov 2008 00:00:00 GMT Sun, 23 Nov 2008 00:00:00 GMT http://backend.userland.com/rss RSS.NET: http://www.rssdotnet.com/ i just found out my dad has liver cancer and that he has 7 to 10 months to live i'm not sure how to deal with the depression that i'm getting insde myself to deal , i'm going crazy as it seems i mean this will be the last thanksgiving ,christmas haloween with him man i'm not sure what i can do can any body help me with some support?! lowrider Tue, 01 Jul 2008 00:00:00 GMT that is very hard news to hear.  Stay on these boards and keep posting and people will reply.. it is a hard thing to go through. Love your Dad and let him love you.  He is going to go through trying times as will you.  DO you have anyone close to you that you can talk to when things get rough?  I will keep looking to see if you are ok... hang in there Chrissy m Wed, 02 Jul 2008 00:00:00 GMT I am so very sorry to hear about your father. I know how hard this is for you.  I myself have breast cancer and was diagnosed two years ago. Try and stay strong for him. He really needs you now. As a mom, it hurts to know that you are having to go through this.  Do you have any close family? Tell you dad just how much he means to you and try and enjoy the time that you left together. No can say that this is going to be easy, but your time together now will mean more than ever.  Stay optimistic - Miracles can happen!! If you ever need someone to listen or talk to, I am hear.  Please keep all of us informed. God Bless You! donnalynn Wed, 02 Jul 2008 00:00:00 GMT  On 7/2/2008 Chrissy m wrote:that is very hard news to hear.  Stay on these boards and keep posting and people will reply.. it is a hard thing to go through. Love your Dad and let him love you.  He is going to go through trying times as will you.  DO you have anyone close to you that you can talk to when things get rough?  I will keep looking to see if you are ok... hang in thereyes i do have family but it is nice and helpful to hear other people that have gone through this as well that is what gives me the support thank you for the reply lowrider Thu, 03 Jul 2008 00:00:00 GMT Hey mateSorry to hear about your dad, my mum got cancer last year.Check this place out, they have herbal cancer treatments that have not been available really until now. This is the pharmacy -http://www.plurbis.com/content/pharmacy This is the msg board for the pharmacy-  http://meditation-mantra.org/alchemy/viewforum.php?f=4  go here and tell them what type of cancer your dad has and they'll advise a regime of treatment.Im trying some of their stuff now for my arthritis :-)  im sure they'll be able to help. I also have a thread going on eastern medicine and am including some very good meditative techniques and will be leading it up to self healing, so your dad might find it useful.G ood luck and God Bless Blakhi Thu, 03 Jul 2008 00:00:00 GMT Sorry to hear about your father.  My mother had small cell lung cancer metastacized to the liver.  She lived for a little over a year once it metastacized to the liver, and despite being sick for some of that last year, she was very thankful for every moment.  There will be days where you might actually not think about your father's illness but then there will be days when you can't think about anything but.  As cliche as it is, take one day at a time.  There are no better words than those simple ones.  My advice would be to start a small notebook that has two sections. One section should be for upcoming appointments, questions for the doctors, and general notes about your dad's health and symptoms.  Even though I said to myself, I won't forget to ask the doctor that question, it is very hard to remember everything......especially for your father.  And you will want to keep track of his symptoms, medicines, etc, because something might jump out to you on a forum board that might help or make you think about something to try.  The other section of the notebook would be for you. To write notes about your thoughts or things you need to do to make the next year easier.  Be sure and ask friends for help with things.  I was always too independent and had trouble asking for help until the very end and I wish I could go back and do things differently.  Even just going to a movie with a friend would have been wonderful at times even when things were getting so depressing.  Sometimes you must really force yourself to live your life.  Always try to think about what your father would be wanting you to do.......living your life as best you can and being a support to him.  You won't be able to do everything for him.....just accept that unfortunately.  But he will appreciate things like sending him a funny postcard or getting him a new book.  Going somewhere and taking lots of pictures to show him.   Be sure and fit in some overnight trips to the beach or wherever.  About six weeks before my mother died, I took her and my two kids to the beach for one night and it was probably one of the best nights of her life despite the pain she was having.  Hang in there.  LC  lccakes Fri, 04 Jul 2008 00:00:00 GMT I know what you must feel like,  My Dad had liver cancer and fought a great battle.  Tell him everything you need to say.  My Dad tried anyhting the doctors told him and i supported him with what ever he wanted.  The last two weeks of his life we spent so much time together.  He knew he was dying and was more concerned for my mom. me and my boys.  Tell him how much you love him and in the end give him permission to die,  My da fought until we all tod him it was alright to go. Remeber that it is emotionally painful for them to leave us.  You are in my prayers.  It gets harder when it is all over.I miss him more now It has been 2 and half months since he went to heaven.  lolomike Thu, 31 Jul 2008 00:00:00 GMT Hi,Unfortunately, I know all too well what you're going through now.  My dad was diagnosed with hepatocellular carcinoma last October, and passed away on March 22 , only 5 months later.  At his diagnosis, the doctors told us he'd have about 6 months without any treatment, or 9 months with treatment.  Of course we were willing to try anything, but there weren't many options available to him.  Because he had numerous tumors on the liver, he was not a candidate for cyberknife surgery, RFA, or anything  else except Nexavar.  He tolerated it fairly well, and remained on it until the week before his death.  I remember having all the same thoughts you mentioned about this being the last birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc. that I'd have to spend with him.  It was made even worse by the fact that my mom was killed in a car accident 6 months earlier, in March 2007, so in addition to knowing it was a season of "lasts" with my dad, it was also a season of "firsts" regarding my mom....first Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc. without her.  Add to that the fact that my little brother passed away in 2004, and I've lost almost my entire family in 3 & 1/2 years.  I have one sister, and we've become incredibly close throughout this ordeal, despite the fact that we live 1500 miles apart.  I think what has helped me deal with the depression and other feelings I still continue to have is knowing I did everything I could to try and help him.  I sold my home, quit my job, and moved 300 miles to live with my father and help him out after my mom died.  He had several other health problems before cancer, and was unable to live alone.  I had almost exactly 1 year to the day with him, and I wouldn't trade that time for anything in the world.  We got to know each other as adults better than we ever had before, and I'm so thankful for the time that we had.  I guess if I can give any advice to you, it would be to spend as much time as possible with him and enjoy it while it lasts.  I can remember just staring at him when he wasn't looking, trying to burn the images into my memory so that I'd have them to hold onto after he was gone.  Prayer has helped me tremendously, as well.  If I can answer any questions you might have, I'd be happy to help.  I'll keep you and your family in my prayers.  Lisa_S Thu, 31 Jul 2008 00:00:00 GMT I also know what you are going through.  I'm very sorry.  I hope the Dr.s are doing everything they can to make him comfortable.  Just try to enjoy what time you guys have.  Even the most simple things like having movie nights or family dinners seemed to make things easier on my end.  But my Dad just accepted he may die. He wanted to finish building his canoe.  That was what really kept him going.  Fortunately for him, he was able to get a living donor transplant that saved his life.  He wouldn't have made it without it.  Keep us posted and you and your family are in my thoughts. reneesunset Thu, 07 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT Low Rider,I'd like you and your father to keep something in mind; if any ONE person has ever beat the disease your father has, than he can beat it! too!!  He has to develop an honest, positive mental attitude and truly see himself in the future, disease-free.  Statistics do NOT apply to individuals, only groups of 30 or more.  What I'm saying is don't give up hope.  On that note, I recommend a book called "There's No Place Like Hope."  It's an easy read and is chock full of bite-sized recommendations and words to live by.   Literally to LIVE by.Stay strong and make sure you're taking time off occasionally from the caregiver role in order to nurture your own well being.Regards,Donald A. W., authorThis Time's a Charm; Lessons of a Four-Time Cancer Survivor ThisTimesaCharm Thu, 07 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT My dad has just been diagnosed with liver cancer as well. His doctor gave him a year. It's so hard. My son was born last year, his only grandchild. It's so hard to watch them together. I can't bear to think that my boy won't remember his grandpa. My dad is only 63 years old and its just killing me. The hard part is that right now he feels fine. It's like we're all just waiting for the bad to start and praying it just won't. I know just what you are feeling. Helpless. Like every minute is just stolen away. Sometimes I literally feel sick to my stomach. I wonder what the holidays will be like as well.  Just know that many people are going throught the exact same thing, you are not alone. yogagirl Tue, 26 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT YogaGirl,I'm crushed that you should have to deal with this.  You boiled your story down to the cruxct and yet it lost no intensity.  I'm not sure if the following quote fits the situation correctly, but it's close and has merit.  "Do not go where the path my lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a  trail.  --- Ralph Waldo Emerson ThisTimesaCharm Wed, 27 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT  On 7/1/2008 lowrider wrote:i just found out my dad has liver cancer and that he has 7 to 10 months to live i'm not sure how to deal with the depression that i'm getting insde myself to deal , i'm going crazy as it seems i mean this will be the last thanksgiving ,christmas haloween with him man i'm not sure what i can do can any body help me with some support?!I’m sorry for what happened to your dad I have prostrate cancer out side the prostrate so it going every were the doctors gave me 5 years and that was two years ago the doctors told me chemo dos not work with prostrate cancer so they couldn’t help me. so far Iv been trying every alternative treatment I can get my hands on I tried Paw Paw and had good reults with it but  when I read your post you story  remained me of a lady where I live who beat liver cancer by drinking 4 glasses of carrot juice a day I’m now on this and it works other cancer patient have said they tried it all said there tumor marker have come down and like me they felt better.  Iv been buying  the carrots and juicing  them my self I was having 4 cups a day but Iv cut it back to two I notest  only after a week it having an effect me I felt better the lady with liver cancer could not sit up she was and so skinny  and constantly  bent over most of the time I saw her eight month later she look so much better  she put on a little bit of weight. I thought if it work for her it will work for me. God bless and take care Ray    jcr65566 Wed, 27 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT  On 7/1/2008 lowrider wrote:i just found out my dad has liver cancer and that he has 7 to 10 months to live i'm not sure how to deal with the depression that i'm getting insde myself to deal , i'm going crazy as it seems i mean this will be the last thanksgiving ,christmas haloween with him man i'm not sure what i can do can any body help me with some support?!I'm so very sorry about your dad I know what your dealing with, my mother in law has liver cancer & we are dealing with the same things you will/ or are. it's not easy BUT whatever you do be by his side with everything he has to go to for. Out of 5 of her children my husban & I are the only ones who go to treatments, MD visits, blood tranfussions every time NO MATTER WHAT she will say you don't have to go BUT we always do. As time goes on they don't seem to hear everything the Dr says( or just hear what they want)  Keep track of everything don't let your dad say it's no big deal. Pain, swelling, discomfort etc LET THE DOCTOR KNOW of any change.Our Prayers are with you,Shelley   cest21 Sat, 06 Sep 2008 00:00:00 GMT I am so very sorry for you and your family.  I lost my father to cancer many years ago and it seems like a part of my heart went with him.  My husband has Esophageal cancer with mets to liver and lymph nodes.  Last month, the doctor told us he probably has 6-12 months.  He is a palliative treatment of chemo to extend his quality of life.  I too am thinking about our last Christmas and other holidays, as well as just being without him. I wonder if he will be well enouph to enjoy Christmas.  I am trying to stay focused on living life one day at a time and just being with him and doing everything I can for him.  I saw my dad everyday after he was diagnosed with lung cancer, until the night he passed away.  It was very difficult for me to see my dad go through his illness and there was a point where I felt I needed to seek couseling to get through it.  It helped me alot.  Now, we have many wonderful 'message boards' on line and everyone here has gone through, or is going through, the same thing we are.  Everyone understands completely and we are all here for you, anytime.   My sister has been NED for 1 year from breast cancer.  I worry about her health everyday.  As the others have said, just be with your dad as much as you can, tell him everything you always wanted to, and make each day a memory for yourself and don't forget to take care of you.  I will check to see how you're doing.  Bless you and your family. marilynv08 Sun, 07 Sep 2008 00:00:00 GMT