CancerCompass message board discussion started by Friendofamom on 9/26/2006 http://www.cancercompass.com/message-board/message/all,7031,0.htm Thu, 21 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT Thu, 21 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT http://backend.userland.com/rss RSS.NET: http://www.rssdotnet.com/ Hi. I am looking for ideas and suggestions. I am the room mother for my son's 4th grade class. One of the mom's was just diagnosed with bladder cancer. She will be going to NYC in 3 weeks for surgery. I want to put together a gift basket for her. Any ideas on what she could enjoy or use or possibly put a smile on her face during this difficult time? Thank you for your time. I really do appreciate your input! Friendofamom Tue, 26 Sep 2006 00:00:00 GMT Cancer related Books --------------------------------------- -The Guide to Living with Bladder Cancer Author: Mark P. Schoenberg, MD, FACS Publisher: Johns Hopkins University Press ISBN: 0-8018-6519-0 -CancerTips: A down to earth travel sized handbook by James Metz, MD. -A Dietitian's Cancer Story: Information and Inspiration for Recovery and Healing, by Diana Dyer, MS, RD, CNSD Uplifting Books ---------------------------------- -The Victoria's Secret Catalogue Never Stops Coming - and Other Lessons I Learned From Breast Cancer, by Jennie Nash - Staying Well With Guided Imagery, by Belleruth Naparstek Other -------------- Portable DVD/CD/tape player. A DVD player is the most expensive but probably the nicest gift. These are useful both in the hospital and later on when in the infusion center getting chemo to take one's mind off things and get the time to pass quicker. A subscription to netflix to go with the DVD player above. A small stuffed animal or toy. (This is helpful for adults and children alike. It can be very comforting to hold during "down time" in the hospital) Hats, scarves, baseball caps. (This is helpful for patients who will be losing their hair due to chemotherapy). A Personal Calendar to keep in purse to jot down when things happened, appointments, etc. Maybe a nice pen too. Useful to keep track of chemo or radiation appointments. A single lottery ticket (To encourage the patient to think about statistics and how anything is possible -- things can turn around so quickly) Small gifts that encourage the use of imagery. (For example one patient used wolves as a metaphor during his battle with cancer, his friends sent him many gifts with a wolf theme. Angels are also popular) Bookmarkers with uplifting sayings on them. A prepaid phone card (Include a note that they may call you any time they feel like they need a little "pick me up") This is nice because hospitals charge a lot to use their long distance service provider. Special drinking mugs A quiet activity to occupy their time such as a scrap book kit, puzzles, cards or board games. Easy-to-move luggage (with wheels- for trips to the hospital) Slippers, Robes, Fashionable pajamas Hand-made coupon they can use for some service you will provide for them, such as taking out the trash, doing housework, making meals, taking them to a movie, etc. Right after they return home from the hospital, they may need a bit of help getting in and out of bed even, or washing up, so meals and housework or even just being able to call you to come over for a few hours when they need help might be useful. Amnia Wed, 27 Sep 2006 00:00:00 GMT Thank you so much. Your ideas were wonderful!!! Friendofamom Wed, 27 Sep 2006 00:00:00 GMT Dear Pamela M.,For an idea about gifts to a new cancer patients go to www.theencourager.com. One of these gift bags was given to me by my surgeon and I tracked down this precious group! You'll love it! You are sooo precious to do this! What a wonderful example you are to your son! Alicat Thu, 28 Sep 2006 00:00:00 GMT Let me start by saying how lucky the students in your class are. When I became ill, it was the simple things that helped just as well as the big things. If she have not been to New York before, find someone that has. Make a list of things that they might want to see or go to. They may have time to do tourist foe a day or two. Do they have a ride to the airport? Do they need a ride home from the airport? Get as many people to write her a get well or any other type of card as you can. This will bring joy to her no matter where she is. Does the mom have a CarePage? My CarePage was a great source communication between myself and my loved ones. "Use CarePages to connect family and friends and share news, support and encouragement. Whether you are in the hospital, receiving care at home, or recovering, CarePages provides the forum to share stories and get support." To get started, please visit www.carepages.com. Most people in New York travel by bus or subway. It is cheaper if you buy a "Metro" card. Look at this link for the costs: http://www.mta.nyc.ny.us/metrocard/mcgtreng.htm#unlimited It is cheaper in my experience to buy the unlimited ride cards. You may think someone may not use a lot of rides, but you would be surprised. We would have saved over $100.00 if we had bought the unlimited card. When I returned home, many families had volunteered to bring us dinner everyday for about two weeks. This takes a burden off of the mom. Not having tom worry about the meal of the day really helps. Do they have anything that needs to be done while they are gone? Do animals have to be fed? Is there any special medical or personal care item that she will need? I needed a hospitol bed, and a place here in town had one to donate. Please tell her that she is in my thoughts and prayers. Shannon Basset Case Thu, 28 Sep 2006 00:00:00 GMT When I was in the hospital with colon cancer a friend put together a nice little package for me. It had a small journal, an Angel, a puzzle book, coloring books and crayons, body lotion, lip balm(much needed), blueberry decaf tea and some life savers. I enjoyed it all!! It was so much nicer than flowers. I had so many of them already. hope this helps you, I hope your friend does well . Skittlebug Thu, 28 Sep 2006 00:00:00 GMT Homemade goodies, (cookies such as sugar cookies, pound cake,) jellies, lotions, magazines, hard candies, novelty socks Dean in Georgia Thu, 28 Sep 2006 00:00:00 GMT Do NOT give her anything with sugar or fructose in it. 80% of the diet of cancer cells is sugar. She must learn to co-doctor. Western MDs are at best 50% effective. Look up Graviola and fucoidan on the Internet. These 2 herbs kill canncer cells. Check out Essiac tea. It will cure cancer. If she does her research she can probably avoid surgery. Start now. Carolyn830 Thu, 28 Sep 2006 00:00:00 GMT i guess everyone is entitled to an opinion. i would like to point out that the above person's belief's have never been studied in clinical trials. all of that information is from testimonials, which, scientifically, do not count for anything. i think it quite arrogant that people who have no medical training quote snippets of information they were told or read on perhaps on a web site making claims in an effort to sell a product. sugar is fine and does not cause cancer to grow. i have read all the BS theories. they are BS. if you had ever taken a class in biochemistry or physiology you would not be quoting this nonsense. there have been no randomized trials. none. that is how fact is separated from fiction. not testimonials. instead of mindlessly repeating things you are told, learn something about the science behind it. thinking that herbs will cure her cancer and prevent the need for surgery is foolishness. doing so allows valuable time to pass and the cancer will spread, so that months from now, a surgical cure will not be possible. telling people to avoid western medicine because your opinion is it is wrong and evil.. telling people to take herbs.. this is irresponsible. do you want this woman's death to be on your hands? she has an excellent chance of cure with surgery, probably well above 90%. can you say the same for your herbs? of course not. there have been no clinical trials. 25 ways to spot Quackery: http://www.quackwatch.org/01QuackeryRelatedTopics/spotquack.html How Quackery Sells: http://www.quackwatch.org/01QuackeryRelatedTopics/quacksell.html How Quackery Harms Cancer Patients: http://www.quackwatch.org/01QuackeryRelatedTopics/harmquack.html ^ last link has similar story about person with cancer who did what the previous responder suggested, and died. Unfortunately, there are many people who make unfounded claims so they may profit from the misfortune of others. In my opinion, the single largest advance in medicine in the last hundred years isn't vaccines or antibiotics, it is the randomized clinical trial. A randomized trial is the only way to determine whether or not a treatment is effective. Somebody stating "this treatment worked for me" is what is known as 'testimonial evidence' and is statistically invalid. I urge everyone to view unproven treatments with a high degree of suspicion and thoroughly investigate the scientific basis of those claims. Amnia Fri, 29 Sep 2006 00:00:00 GMT I am not a very creative person but I did experience 30 days of hospitalization for cancer. People from work sent me a whole lot of cards. I even received cards from people who did not know me but knew of me. I am an oncology nurse at a hospital. The girls got together, contated the lymphoma and leukemia society who helped them organize a fund raiser for me. I was shocked! They sold Gold Cannon Candles for the fund raiser. Between sales and donations, they presented me with $1,500 at a luncheon. Taking her out to lunch whether by yourself or with other interested people is real meaningful. The first lunch they took me to, they presented me with lots of gifts and caring. It was at another luncheon that they gave me the cash gift. Pajamas/nightgowns are very nice. It feels a lot better to wear personal feminine gowns than those one size fits all hospital gowns. The idea about the homemade gift coupons is a great idea. My mother-in-law had to come help me the first week I was home. I could not have made it without her because my husband had to keep working. I not only needed help physically, but psychologically I was depressed and feeling sorry for myself at first. I had lost 20 pounds, was pale, weak, fatigued and bald headed. If that doesn't depress a person I don't know what would! Arranging with different people to take her family dinner for a while is a great idea. I don't know if "she" will feel like eating much, but I know she won't feel like cooking. This is helpful for the husband also because he will have a lot of stress on his plate to deal with. There is so much you can do and your first corresponder covered a whole lot. Just letting her know you are willing to help will be great. God Bless you for your desire and willingness to help. Beasely Fri, 29 Sep 2006 00:00:00 GMT All the responses are excellent. However, you need to have one person in charge of who is bringing the meals, and what they are to cook. They can not change their mind. Otherwise, you could have chicken 5 nights a week! This was done for me,and so appreciated. Also, you could have a soccer mom in charge of getting the child to games etc. Music mom, ccd mom etc. Sending cards is so uplifting, you have no idea. Send a funny cartoon you see in the paper, and don't limit yourself to just one card. Remember this is an on going treatment etc. I am 18 months out of surgery, treatments etc, and I still get cards etc. Your friend is SO lucky to have a great support network of friends. Vette Vette Sun, 01 Oct 2006 00:00:00 GMT My father had bladder cancer sugery and it was difficult both physically and mentally. We had people stay with him each night in the hospital becasue they are so overworked (nurses) and not attentive enough. If you could find people who she is comfortable with and would stay that is the best thing to do. Even if you take turns during the day so the family could get a break this is a great blessing for those in the family. Once she is home the best gifts are dinners and food. Dad received many home cooked meals and we have a delivery service in CHicago that you can buy certifictes and the loved ones can order from any restaurant in this book that delivers. This is a great way for the person to have what they feel like eating brought to them. My friend had cancer and the set up a schedule for popel to bring food for the family every day for dinner for four weeks until she was stronger. Hope this helps! Heart Sun, 01 Oct 2006 00:00:00 GMT