All Messages

On 3/5/2007 Having Faith wrote:

I was diagnosed with breast cancer 7 yrs ago.I am 47 yrs old. Got a call from the hospital today telling me I need a ultasound done. They found something on mamagram. I have been feeling sick all day. Even tho I don't know anything yet, it is the scariest thing you can go through, Not knowing. So many things go through your mind, it makes you crazy. I lost my 26 yr old son Last January to a rare cancer that 1 in a million kids get( an adult cancer). That was devastating to go through. I am raising 2 daughters on my own. I went through 4 surgery's and 6 weeks of radiation. I caught the cancer at a very early stage too. I am just so afraid that the cancer has come back. Trying to be strong, but don't know for how long!!!   

I am so sorry to hear about your phone call....I am a cancer survivor and I can't imagine what must be going through your mind right now. The phone call that all of us survivors never want to receive.  You are so justified in your feelings right now.  The loss of your son, what can I say, I have a 24 year old son and a 25 year  old daughter.  That is something I don't know if I could live through, losing one of them.  I can tell that you are a really strong woman even though you probably don't feel that way right now.  I don't know if there is anything I can say to you right now to make you feel better except that I do believe you must have faith...without it, we don't have anything to believe in.  I hope you keep in touch with this board so we know what is going on with you.  I would love to hear from you and if you just need to vent or talk.....I will be glad to listen....my prayers are going out to you tonight......write back sometime, take care of those daughters and know they love you more than anything....

Wendy

On 2/28/2007 Madeline Ruth wrote:

Dear Sweet, I saw your post and just had to respond to you. I am so sorry that you and your boyfriend are going through so much pain. My mother recently died of a Grade IV brain tumor, and she and I often discussed the spiritual part of dealing with the disease and life and death in general. One thing that she told me, that she had taught me her entire life, is that it is so very important that each of us know what we believe, so that when tragedy strikes, our faith is in tact, and we don't begin to question our beliefs at our most vulnerable time in life. Sweet, God doesn't cure cancer....it has other causes. Some we know, and some we do not know. And, in the same respect, God isn't going to pick and choose who He cures of cancer. If He were going to intervene to prevent our pain and suffering here on earth, then surely, He would have intervened and save His only son from being murdered on the cross. There is a book, When Bad Things Happen to Good People, that is very good, that you may want to read. I read it and it gave comfort to me. I think the most important thing for you to remember is that God hurts WITH you. He doesn't come down and make everything okay by taking away the suffering or the hardship, but HE helps you to deal with these things that happen in life, by being faithful to you and by being your comfort. Prayer is a comfort to you. It is communicating with God. Praying that something will turn out a certain way, doesn't mean that God will wave a magic wand and fix everything. But...God is always there, He loves you, and He walks beside you every step of the way, and in knowing this and feeling this presence, you will gain strength and peace to get through the difficult times in life. If everything were perfect in this world, we would'nt need God. A friend told me once, that the reason these horrible things happen in our lives is because this isn't Heaven. That's a good point. We live in an imperfect world where bad things happen, and sometimes there just is no good reason and it has no meaning. The most important thing is that we give these things meaning by using our experiences to help others who go through similar situations. That's the only meaning we can give to such awful tragedy. Remember Job in the Old Testament? I have always believed that Job is a parable. Some people believe that there really was a Job. But, the most important thing about Job is the message. No matter what happens to us in our lives and no matter how bad it is, we must always be faithful to God, and He will be ever faithful to us in return. It's all in how we handle things in life. That's what makes the difference. I know that it's hard to pray and not ask "why?" Try to pray that God give you peace and strength. Tell Him how you hurt and ask for comfort. And then hopefully, you will receive the "peace that passeth all understanding", which is peace in your heart in spite of not understanding the circumstances. I'm so sorry for you grief and sorrow as your boyfriend travels this journey. How fortunate he is to have someone like you care so much about him.

Dear Madeline...

Your message was so poetic.......it made me feel better just reading it.  I have so struggled with God over these past few years but you wrote so beautifully about his love and comfort.  I think that God has given me the people that are in my life for a reason......so in essence, he has given me strength in numbers and I am still here to talk about it.....I am a very lucky woman and hear what you say....and I hope  I hear and understand what God is saying.. God bless you Madeline...

On 2/28/2007 Chicagomike wrote:

I am a cancer patient with a pretty grim prognosis from Stage 4 colorectal cancer. I am 50. I have a wife and a 12 year old son and 15 yr old daughter.

I believe in God as I am a Deist. However I don't find strength in prayer. I find strength in people. My friends and family have helped me more than any prayer. I have found peace of mind by talking with other cancer patients, doctors and nurses. 

How incredibly cruel that a 21 year old young man with his whole life ahead of him and a loving person like you in his life has to go through this s**t. The best you can do is stay positive, don't give up hope and support him in every way. For yourself, find others in similar situations and communicate. Talking about it somehow is a pressure valve that makes it more tolerable.

All of us are affected by this and we will be forever changed from the experience. There are few positives but there are some. We will be more empathetic. We'll learn a lot about ourselves. We will have completely different perspectives on so much of life like illness, healthcare, pain, God, hope, death etc. etc etc.. Best of luck and hang in there.

Dear Chicago,

I could not have said it any better.  You certainly find out who your friends are and who your life support will be.  I myself am a four year survivior of what they say is a terminal cancer.  Our lives most definately will be changed forever, I know mine has.  My greatest comfort has been in the wisdom of other cancer patients and survivors.  Sometimes, that is all we have. 

Take care....Wendy

On 2/28/2007 Sweetsteffers04 wrote:

I don't mean to offend anyone here, but i just wanted to share my point of view.  I feel like ever since my boyfriend was diagnosed with cancer that god had in no way helped me through this. 

I have prayed and prayed for god to save russell's life.  He is only 21 years old and he was still a child when he was diagnosed.  He still is a child.  He doesn't deserve to die this young.

Ever since russell's diagnose, i feel myself losing more and more faith in god.  I now believe that there is no god because he put such a innocent soul through such a hard battle.

It is so hard for me to see him be so scard, i want so badly to help him through this.  I don't want him to be scard. 

Dear sweet:

I am a cancer survivor.  Like you, had a really hard time with the whole God thing.  I was angry, scared and not really believing in him.  I have a really great family that helped me through my journey with cancer.  I totally understand how you feel and that you feel completely helpless right now.  I would not have made it through this without my kids and my mother and my very best friends.  If God had his hand in this than I am thankful.  I don't know what the outcome will be for your boyfriend.  I can tell just by how you talk that you love him very very much.  All you can do at this point is let him know that you are here for him and that you love him very much.  There is nothing in life like the suffering of cancer and the pain and misery that comes with it.  Be there for him and know that it is okay for you to be scared.  Love him as much as you can and give him strength for his journey, whatever it may be.

Thinking of you in this time of desperation....Wendy

On 2/12/2007 Kellbell529 wrote:

Wendy,

Thank you for your nice message.  I just feel I need to do more for this disease.  I am so happy though that you are a four year survivor...that is wonderful!!!!  What were your symptoms, etc.?  Where are you from? Are you cancer free as of now?  What did they do for you after you were diagnosed?

I wish that I had the money to start a foundation for PPC...it's a shame that it is just not looked at as much, especially since it is becoming more common.

 My sister and I are going on Monday to see a hematologist/oncologist, because from what research I have seen, I have learned that there are 2 genes in your body that may put you at greater risk for developing PPC or ovarian cancer.  We are meeting with this doctor to get further information and for his input on my mom's death/diagnosis. 

 I am so grateful that there are people like you who can lift spirits when needed......I am still so angry though and feel so cheated.  I had a wonderful relationship with my mom (probably better than most mothers/daughters).....she was my life...and we had so much fun together.  It's hard to accept it at all and it seems like each day is getting harder and not easier.  I am on medication and see a therapist to help and that does...but it's hard to come to the realization that my mom is dead. 

Thank you again! 

Kelly

 

Hi Kelly,

I am so sorry for your sadness.  I still just can't imagine what your life must be like right now without your mom.  It sounds as though you both loved each other very, very much.  I know you are angry as you should be.  Please make sure you get the genetic tests.  I need to get them done as well for the sake of my own children.  Let me know what your outcome is from those tests. 

Stay with the therapist as long as he/she is helping you.  Death of a parent is so hard especially when you are young.  Please try and get up everyday and think of something that your mom did for you that made you happy.  She would want that for you.  You absolutely must go through the grieving process but in the mean time, try to think of the good and happy times that you had with your mom.  She will always be with you in spirit honey and will always be looking out for you in her own way.  I truly believe that.

If you would like to email me, please feel free to do so honey.  My email is wendyleemoo@yahoo.com.  I look at my emails everyday and if you just need to blow off some steam, I will be here for you,

By the way, I live in Maryland right now.  I am 47 years old and I am a flight attendant for Southwest Airlines.  I have two kids, a girl that is 25 and a son that is 23.  They are my life and they have had to go through this with me as well.  It was extremely hard for my son.  He was in constant denial.  Sometimes I think he still is.  However, my daughter and I talk about this subject a lot.  She was my biggest advocate through this whole process.  She, like you, was very upset by the lack of information on this disease.  She and I have always been very close and I believe that this brought us closer together.  I am sure she will tell you that she was also very scared.  I lost my marriage over this as my husband could not cope or deal with a sick wife.  But in the long run, it was a bad marriage anyway and I am so lucky to have a second chance at life.  I have learned that you must live everyday like it is your last....just like Tim McGraw says ha ha.....

Where are you from Kelly?  tell me a little about yourself and your family.  I would love to hear about your mom so feel free to write me and tell me anything you like.  Keep her spirit alive Kelly!!!!

Hope to hear from you soon.  Keep that chin of yours up.......

Wendy

Hi Kelly,

I am so, so sorry to hear about your mom.  I can't even begin to tell you how you must be feeling right now.  I am a four year survivor of this disease and everything you have said is absolutely true.  I don't know if there is any research going on out there honey.  I had no symptoms either.  I  guess I was just lucky that I was diagnosed early enough to be treated.  I too, had ct scans and blood work and everything came back normal.  I was lucky enough to have a great surgeon who was aggressive with her treatment and I am still here.  I try to find research being done and I can't find anything so far.......I am sure if you have been reading any of these messages you will find that we are all in the same boat.

Keep you chin up Kelly...I am here if you want to chat.  Take care of that sweet baby of yours....

 Wendy

On 1/25/2007 Dooney_0_6 wrote:

I HAVE LOTS OF QUESTIONS ABOUT STOMACH CANCER... LET ME KNOW IF ANY ONE IS WILLING TO TALK WITH ME...

THANK YOU

Hello Dooney,

I would be glad to talk with you.  What kind of Cancer does your mom have?  Is it just in her stomache? I am a four year primary peritoneal cancer survivor...it was also in my stomache...although it was the lining of the stomache.  Give me some details about your mom and I will try and give you any help that I can.  I am not a doctor but a good listener.  My name is Wendy.  I am 46 years old and again a survivor.  My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family.

Wendy

On 1/19/2007 Too Young wrote:

Hi Survivor  I am a married 29 year old with a 4 month old baby and have just been diagnosed with PPC. I am about to start chemo this Tuesday and am wondering if you have any advice ? I had a pap smear after my little boy was born and this showed an abnormal smear which ended up to be cancerous cells on my cervix. They were all removed and when I was having my check up for that they found the tumour in my stomache. I had a radical hysterectomy, bilateral Salpingo Oopherectomy and omenectomy debulking. They say I am at stage 3 but wont explain much else. My oncologist seems quite positive about getting all the cancer but every where I read there doesnt seem to be a lot of hope. The cancer has spread to the lining of my liver, bowel, bladder and underneath my diaphram. What stage were you at when you started chemo ? any tips on handling the side effects of chemo ?? I want to prepare myself as much as possible !! Any advice would be great  

Hello too young,

Sent you a private message a couple of days ago...been thinking about you..how did your first chemo treatment go?  Let me know when you come back online and I will be happy to chat with you.  Hang in there

Wendy

On 7/20/2006 Annie2 wrote:

My mother was diagnosed with primary peritoneal carcinoma back in 2000. She had surgery and chemotherapy in 2000 and was healthy for the last 6 years. Unfortunately, they just discovered a new tumor so we're going through this again. She really doesn't have any symptoms at this point, they seem to have caught it fairly early this time. We are optimistic. The only advice I have is to hang in there and be optimistic. My mother had a good five years and we're hoping after this next round of chemo she will have more good years. Best wishes.

HI Annie2,

Can  I ask you where the tumor was located and how they found it?  How is your mom now?  Are they giving her the same type of chemo again?

I am a four year survivor of ppc but have been having some weird symptoms although all of my testing has been normal.  I am getting ready to have some ct scans done but I don't rely heavily on that test because it is very deceptive.  They were clear when I was diagnosed and thank god I had an aggressive oncologist who opened me up.....hence I am still here because of her.

Thanks for any information you can give me about your mom,  You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Wendy

On 8/17/2006 Bobbyjean wrote:

Hello, I am sorry to hear of your loss and hope you are doing well under the circumstances. My mother was diagnosed a two days ago with Primary Peritoneal Cancer. She was not feeling well and had a couple of MRI's which revealed a tumor. They initially thought it was a slow growing form of cancer but a few days later she started accumulating fluid outside of her lungs and had great difficulty breathing. The fluid was drained and it revealed cancer cells which were also confirmed at the same time with biopsy results. This form of ovarian cancer came as a surprise as she had a Hysterectomy thirty years ago unrelated to cancer. Untreated they said she would only have a few months. She started Chemo treatment yesterday with Taxol and Cytoplatin. We hope with the treatment she has a few more years of quality life & your posting gives me hope since your mom had five years.

Hello,

I am new to this site and wish I would have known about it a long time ago.  I am a four year survivor of ppc.  I would like to know how your mom is doing now? 

 My prayers are with you and try and keep a positive attitude.  I think that is the only thing that helped me make it through, besides my family. 

Let me know how she is doing and if you just need to talk, I would be glad to listen.

Wendy