Feeling anxious and down

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Feeling anxious and down

by northern232001 on Thu Jan 10, 2019 05:45 PM

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Hi everyone,

My mom was diagnosed with Pancreatic cancer in February of 2018 and I've been on an emotional roller coaster ever since. She has been so strong and positive through all of this. She is considered to be in remission for which I am glad, but I still worry. I'm constantly worried to the point that people are starting to notice that something is wrong with me. I have told a few people about my mom, but I generally keep it bottled up. There are days that I feel like I just can't go on. I worry about the future so much and I feel so lost, alone and out of control. It's hard to manage these feelings along with just living life. I've suffered with anxiety and depression for years and this diagnosis has only pushed me closer to the edge. I pray, I practice mindfulness and try to be positive, but nothing seems to be working for me. I'm just down and sad all of the time. How does one live like this? How do I cope? I know my mom worries about me because she knows I'm not handling things well and it makes me feel bad. I just can't imagine losing her. I just can't.

RE: Feeling anxious and down

by Tuffgirl on Thu Jan 10, 2019 07:34 PM

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Hi Feeling anxious,

Please try not to spend any more days like this and put it in the hands of a higher power. Believe me I have and still do sometimes feel that constant fear of what if it comes back feeling. I have beat leukemia so far and i am still scared but i am slowly trying to return back to my new normal. Enjoy life with your mom because that is what I am trying to do with my daughter who is only 14 and was 12 when I was diagnosed. Talk about fear of leaving her.

People in the bone marrow transplant clinic that have gone through what I have sometimes tell me they dont worry at all and I have such a hard time with it but I am coming out of the funk slowly and it has been two years. But we truly are meant to live in the moment. I am so glad your mom is in remission. And continued health to us all

RE: Feeling anxious and down

by northern232001 on Thu Jan 10, 2019 09:58 PM

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Hi Tuffgirl,

I'm glad that you've beat leukemia!! I wish you well on your journey. You are right. I need to put this in this in the hands of a higher power and try to live without fear. I want to enjoy life again. Thank you for your words of encouragement and I wish you all the best. Here's to living life one day at a time.

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