Worried

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Worried

by Coopercoop on Thu Jun 20, 2019 10:25 PM

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I’m very worried that I may have HNC... here is the story (sorry if it’s super long). In March I went to dentist and pointed out these growths on my tongue that had been there for about a year (I know, I know). The dentist did a veloscope exam as well as a visual and physical exam. He said they are just normal pappillae of the tongue. I had also made an appointment with an ENT so I followed up. ENT did a scope and said he saw some pustules on my tongue and some stuff in my tonsil crypts. He pushed a lot of it out and prescribed me antibiotics. I admittedly didn’t take them - I didn’t have any symptoms of infection and I’ve had strep and tonsillitis before. My concerns sort of went to the back burner excuse I had gallbladder surgery and that was my focus. End of May I felt this weird sensation in my neck when I turned my head. Sort of a popping feeling but not painful. Just weird and worrisome. Only happened when I turned to the left so I started diligently inspecting my right side where I felt it. My neck muscle (bad at anatomy but the big thick one) just felt a little sore when I rubbed it hard but so did my other one - I carry stress in my neck and am guilty of looking down at my phone. I decided to go to my PCP anyway. She suggested maybe I’d been sick... nope. Then said it was likely TMJ (it’s certainly a possibility... I have woken up with jaw tenderness before and notice that I clench.) She sent me on my way. A couple of days later I noticed my right tonsil was bigger than the left and when I hit it with the waterpik, it bled a little and hurt. I made an appointment with the ENT. She scoped me and said yes it is bigger but it’s not huge and looks healthy. She gave me info about TMJ and prescribed more antibiotics. She ordered a CT for my reassurance, telling me if it made me more anxious, she would cancel it. I asked her if she felt we should biopsy the tonsil and she said not at all. CT was scheduled for 2 weeks from then. I started feeling around a lot and found two palpable nodes under my jaws (bilateral). Both are moveable, I have to search for them but can always find them. Seem to be around 1 cm. I also felt what I thought was another lump just around the angle of my jaw on the swollen tonsil side. Made appointment with PCP because ENT doesn’t have urgent appointments without referral. PCP was annoyed, suggested my anxiety was out of control. Made the whole appointment about that. Said she couldn’t feel what I did even when I felt the spot for her. She said I didn’t have risk factors and then I mentioned my history of HPV (cervical positive in 2006 but negative since and I had the vax in 2009/2010). She made a comment about how it wasn’t a concern unless I’d had oral sex and I replied that I had and she said that I’d just have to wait for my cat scan. She commented again about it being likely TMJ, which I’m certainly not refuting. I started taking the antibiotics, why not? No change in the nodes but it’s been only a few days. I had my CT yesterday but haven’t heard anything. I’m just in such a state. I’ve read a million different things... like having no symptoms other than a large node to having a myriad of symptoms. Or having no nodes and just a swollen tonsil. I thought maybe since my nodes I feel are bilateral that that is a good sign and then I’ve read others say that they had really small nodes and that was how they discovered their cancer. I’m also still having strange twinges in my neck. The popping feeling stopped a few days ago. My neck feels swollen or just inflamed but I’ve been non stop prodding it and don’t know if I’ve caused that. Anyway, not sure what I’m looking for, maybe some good vibes. I am worried that because I’m 35 and female I’m being looked at as anxious because of low level of suspicion.
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