Husbands Cancer

10 Posts | Page(s): 1 

Husbands Cancer

by Catm61 on Fri Jul 22, 2005 12:00 AM

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Hi, my husband is 60 yrs old. He was diagnosed with prostate cancer about 4 weeks ago. PSA 13.7, gleason score 7 (3+4), stage t2b. His surgery is scheduled for this Wed. July 27. His doctor decided to do a cat scan to rule out kidney stones before the surgery and they found a mass on his right kidney. They thought it was just a simple fluid filled cyst, but to make sure they did an ultrasound on Monday. Well the report says that it is a complex cyst and needs to be evaluated. His surgeon who is a urologic oncologist has recommended going ahead with the prostate surgery because it is all set up and doing the kidney evaluation during the recouperation period. But when I pushed for an answer on what the mass could be he said a tumor and gave it more than a 50% chance of being cancerous. I'm very nervous that if we go ahead with the surgery and he has kidney cancer that the new cancer will be more aggresive and we will be waisting time on a cancer we know is so slow growing that it could wait. If it is cancer in the kidney the doctor said it would be a seperate type, not a met of the prostate. My husband at first was sure he wanted to know what was going on before he had the surgery but now he is starting to lean towards just taking care of the prostate and dealing with the kidney later. I'm starting to get pretty scared. We have 5 children the youngest being 8 and only one out of high school. Thanks for any advice or support in advance

Husbands Cancer

by Bizzione on Fri Jul 22, 2005 12:00 AM

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Hello Cathy! I think that second and third opinion is a must! Do not waist time! Do it as fast as possible and always keep in mind that doctors who push for surgery need to be re-evaluated by you and your husband. I myself was diagnosed recently with prostate cancer. So far it is very small tumor and Gleason score is 6. I am still trying to decide what treatment would be the most proper. It is not easy to make the decision. Please, keep posting about your husband's situation! I am sure you will get some suggestions and opinions on this Board. All the best! Erik

Question re Husband

by Patrick1 on Sat Jul 23, 2005 12:00 AM

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I concur that you should get more opinions from specialists. Who knows at this point which tumor is more significant and thus needs the first attention. Can they do a biopsy on the kidney tumor? Seems like an obvious approach. Good luck to you and your family, and keep writing with updates and questions. I had surgery (prostatectomy) for metastatic prostate cancer 3.5 years ago. Gleason 9-10, PSA 7. Been on Lupron since then and remain in remission with undetectable PSA, so there is great room for hope. Pat K.

Question re Husband

by Bizzione on Wed Jul 27, 2005 12:00 AM

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Pat, your case is truly encouraging to many. Can you tell me if you have some side effects while receiving the Lupron? Regards,Erik

Reply to Erik t. re Side Effects of Lupron

by Patrick1 on Wed Jul 27, 2005 12:00 AM

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Hi Erik, I certainly am glad that my story is encouraging to others. As far as side effects to the Lupron, I really have done very well on it. I am completely impotent from Lupron, but since without testosterone (mine is below 16) I have minimal desire. I had nerve sparing, so if I EVER get off this stuff, maybe I can get a rise, so to speak! I am completely continent, energy seems a little low (sometimes a hit a wall) but I am very active for age 65. My faculties seem intact. Surprisingly, my bone density is normal, no loss at all (I just had a bone density test). Apparently that is unusual. I take a variety of supplements, including soy protein concentrate, lycopene, green tea extract, boron, selenium, calcium and a powerful multivitamin/supplement. I also exercise daily, typically playing tennis or walking the golf course or fishing (rowing and paddling with a pontoon boat), etc. I try to work out if I am not able to do the above exercises. I am fortunate to have a fine group of friends and a loving supportive wife. So I am sure that the above helps, but I'm not sure in what proportion. Good fortune to all of you and may we stay as healthy as possible for as long as possible. Pat K

Side Effects of Lupron

by Bizzione on Thu Jul 28, 2005 12:00 AM

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Pat! Great post again! Thanks! I am hoping that I will also have minimal side effects. The impotence is something my wife and I see as very small price to pay for LIFE. I am still on CASODEX. So far none of side effects from that. This coming Tuesday I will be receiving the first LUPRON injection so like I said in one of my previous posts...... the ball is rolling now! No way back! I wonder how many injections I will have to get. I think all that depends on how quickly my prostate will shrink. Thanks to my wife I am getting healthy nutrition for many years now and we both take additional supplements and herbs. We eat lot's of soy products and junk food is NOT on our menu. I hope that my body will respond me now when I need it! :-) May we all be blessed with long and healthy lives!

Effects of Lupron Injections

by Patsy on Mon Aug 15, 2005 12:00 AM

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Prostate cancer was discovered in my husband in early 2001. After sonograms, bone scans, etc. he opted for surgical removal of the prostate. No incontinence has occurred. However, since he has been receiving Lupon injections, he has no sexual desire whatsoever. I know he loves me but a quick kiss at night is about it. Doesn't feel inclination to snuggle, hold hands, etc. He has received several of these shots. I've questioned the doctor about no sign of sexual desire and the doctor tells me it will return. He does have hot flashes which he had been alerted to. If he continues to receive injections, nothing will change. Of course, I want his life more than sex but a little smooch once in a while would be nice. His PSA dropped to almost non-existent following surgery in Aug 2001 but last month it spiked to 9 which it's never been. Have other spouses out there experienced this? I'd love to hear from you. Pat

Side Effects of Lupron, Esp. Sex and Affection

by Patrick1 on Mon Aug 15, 2005 12:00 AM

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Patsy, Sorry to hear of the loss of affection/sexual interest from your spouse. I am not surprised, however. I had a prostatectomy in 2001 and have been on lupron (hormone therapy) ever since. See my prevous posts, and those of others re side effects. Sexual interest and even the desire for intimate contact is really reduced or eliminated by HT, in my experience and that of many others. Normal testosterone level for a 60 yr. old male is (I think) 300 to 400. Mine has dropped to about 16 due to lupron. I love my wife dearly and we have a great relationship in general, but I am completely impotent (due to lupron) and have no interest in intimate contact. Fortunately, she has always had a low libido level and so she stresses that this doesn't bother her. Sometimes I wonder if she is completely honest about this, but she seems to be. However, if she told me that she really needs to cuddle, hold hands, kiss, etc. I absolutely would because I want her to be happy, and I would be fine with that level of contact. In fact, we do hug and kiss some, though we don't really cuddle. There are some other issues besides HT that could be having an influence too. Your husband may fear that intimate contact could lead to your desire for sex, and he wouldn't be able to perform. That's tough on a guy's ego. Besides, no one wants to seriously disappoint someone they love. However, if you are very explicit with him that you miss the affection and contact and ask him if the two of you could resume that aspect of your relationship, he might be quite willing. Worry/anxiety can also interfere with affection, so because of his health or other matters, anxiety or depression could be factors. Perhaps you two could discuss these various possibilities. Anyway, these are just my thoughts and opinions and I hope they might help. Good luck to you both. Pat K

Effects of Lupron, Lack of Affection

by Patsy on Tue Aug 16, 2005 12:00 AM

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Dear Patrick 1: thanks for your thoughts. I don't seem to have anyone to really talk to about this. It's funny that you should address me as "Patsy". I believe I signed my message "Pat". My husband is the only one who calls me "Patsy". My mother used to when I was quite young. Your wife is a lucky woman to know that if she wants a kiss or a hug, you will do so because you love her so much. Hopefully, this will get better. We'll see. Until then, thanks again. Pat

Lack of Affection

by Patrick1 on Wed Aug 17, 2005 12:00 AM

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Hi Pat (!), Actually your screen name came up as Patsy on the message board, tho you did sign your post as Pat....Anyway, mutual support is really important in a relationship, especially during tough times, as both of you are undergoing right now. I'm sure you both need TLC, understanding and support, whether or not your husband would admit that he is needy during this crisis. I hope that you two can communicate deeply with each other, but it sounds like that is problematic. So the next step might be counseling so that both of you might express your needs, feelings, and fears individually and to each other, and hopefully strengthen your communication and relationship. Your primary relationship should be a much-needed bastion of strength and and a refuge in these troubled times. The counseling could come from a licensed mental health practioner, your pastor, etc. Perhaps you know of someone or could get a good referral, since it is very important that who you see is skilled, trained, and compatible with you. (I am a retired clinical psychologist, so that's my background for making this suggestion.) If you decide not to take this route now, and still want to see if your situation improves "on its own" please keep the option open in case the problem continues. Best of Health and Good Fortune to you both. Pat K
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