Hospice

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Hospice

by kerryfriend on Sun Oct 14, 2012 02:25 PM

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My husband had been fighting pancreatic cancer since October 5, 2011. This past Thursday we were told no more chemo can be done. They said that it could kill him. Said that it was time for hospice. Have a hospice nurse coming tomorrow. I am so scared. He is now yellow. He tries talking but is having a hard time. He is now talking like he has been drinking. Has trouble remembering things. He was doing so good and within like a day I can't believe how much everything has changed. He is sleeping almost all the time. I am heart broken. This is the hardest thing that I have ever had to do. Watching my best friend....I am angry, sad, fearful, want to scream!!!!!

RE: Hospice

by fxrchopper2003 on Sun Oct 14, 2012 04:06 PM

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I pray for you and your husband to find peace.  I pray for this to be as painless of a transiton as it can be for your husband.  I'm sure the hospice nurse is very good at giving you the signs and symptoms of his disease in this process that must take place.  One day at a time....sweet Jesus!  Blessings!

RE: Hospice

by lucky2Bhere on Sun Oct 14, 2012 06:07 PM

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Prayers being sent to you & your dear husband.  Hospice is there for both of you.  I'm so sorry you have to go thru this. I hope you can both find comfort & peace..

I'm not there yet, but I have instructed my family that this is what I want when the time comes. Look deep in your heart, You know he would not want to leave you & he loves you with all his heart. But, the suffering...... I love my family, & it hurts me to see them suffering so much too.

I have learned sleep is my friend, when I sleep I don't have the pain & anguish associated with it. Hospice can give him comfort & peace.  I pray you find this comfort & peace too.

I believe in an afterlife, a glorious afterlife that  will unite us together again. I believe we all must leave this world, & there is no time there. Be strong, he willl be at your side. & live well, celebrate his life, try to remember the good times. That is what I'd want, I think he would want that for you too. God Bless you both. May the angels fold you in their wings & comfort both of you. Hugs & prayers. Candy

RE: Hospice

by BlessedDaughter on Mon Oct 15, 2012 01:15 AM

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On Oct 14, 2012 2:25 PM kerryfriend wrote:

My husband had been fighting pancreatic cancer since October 5, 2011. This past Thursday we were told no more chemo can be done. They said that it could kill him. Said that it was time for hospice. Have a hospice nurse coming tomorrow. I am so scared. He is now yellow. He tries talking but is having a hard time. He is now talking like he has been drinking. Has trouble remembering things. He was doing so good and within like a day I can't believe how much everything has changed. He is sleeping almost all the time. I am heart broken. This is the hardest thing that I have ever had to do. Watching my best friend....I am angry, sad, fearful, want to scream!!!!!

Kerry,

I am so sorry. I am praying for you and your dear husband. I will be praying for peace and comfort for you both. I agree with Candy....I think we're separated for a time but when we pass we will be together in a place that is perfect. May God bless you and keep you both.

RE: Hospice

by kerryfriend on Mon Oct 15, 2012 01:52 PM

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Thank you all so much for the kind words and prayers. I find myself having melt downs. I know that this day would come but just can't believe how quickly things turn down hill. Just Wednesday last week he was laughing and joking. Now he talks real slow and almost sounds like he has been drinking. Sleeps almost all the time. Although I have cheerished the time around 9pm when he is more awake. I don't want him to suffer but am so sad to be loosing him. He is my best friend and soul mate.

RE: Hospice

by bestfriendmom on Tue Oct 16, 2012 01:38 PM

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I am so sorry to hear about your husband.  I have read some of your other postings over the last fwe months.  Like everyone else, my prayers and thoughts are with you.

RE: Hospice

by Harts on Wed Oct 17, 2012 03:32 AM

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You have my sympathy and my prayers. I also have PC and wonder how it will end. It bothers me that your husband was laughing and then a week later can hardly talk.... Is he getting over medicated? Or maybe thats the way it goes? 

I may sound crazy, but I'm glad I'm dying from cancer instead of having died from a sudden death. I've been given time to cherish family and friend time. Time to get closer to God. Time to do things I have been putting off.

Praying you remember the good times. Feel the peace that only comes from God. He's going to help you through this !!

RE: Hospice

by Jayday on Fri Oct 19, 2012 01:44 PM

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Hi Kerry I am goin though the same thing with my husband we have been told there is nothing that can be done . He is coming home from hospital I am heartbroken we had so many dreams . Hope your are ok I know what you are going though.

RE: Hospice

by Stillkickin2012 on Fri Oct 19, 2012 03:04 PM

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I am so sorry you have to go through this. I am 47 and a cancer survivor. I lost my father to bile duct cancer in 2010. By the time he was diagnosed, there was no hope. His decline was more gradual, but I wish, for his sake it hadn't been. For me, he was gone long before be passed away. His passing was a relief. A relief from his pain and suffering. Just know that he has a much better place waiting for him. Hospice is amazing, and I can't imagine my father could have posssibly gotten any better care. They became good friends. You will find strength you never knew you had. Please remember to take care of yourself too. And ask for help when you need it.

RE: Hospice

by GrannyNan on Wed Oct 31, 2012 11:44 PM

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Kerry,

Go ahead, scream!  Get it out hon.  I know how difficult this is, but it is out of your control. Try to just move with it. This is so scary. I'm sure. By now, your husband fight might have ended. If not, I pray the Lord's peace and strength on you and him in a mighty way. I pray that the Lord wraps His arms around the both of you and pulls you to His chest. Lay your head on His chest, and allow yourself to hear his heart beat. May your heart beat with His and may He soothe your brow with His loving touch. You are going through all the normal feelings during this time; however allow it to move you closer to and not further away from the Lord. He loves you both, and these things happen. We don't always know the answer why, but we can know that He can CARRY us through it all. God Bless you Sweety. Hugs GrannyNan

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