The death of a spouse - in words

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RE: The death of a spouse - in words

by SarahGrey on Fri Oct 04, 2013 03:45 AM

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Awww really?  LOL I think our pets understand us (to a point, anyway)  :)   My old dog and old cat were BRILLIANT, I tell ya.  Well...  at least they understand the sound of love and excitement in a person's voice ;)  Unless they're deaf.  (lol)  But then I imagine they can interpret a smiling face to mean good things :)

As for "talking to myself" well....  I talk to my husband all the time.  I have no doubt he can hear me.  If anyone were to actually SEE me, however...  I'd likely be committed.  Do you think I can get wi-fi in a padded room?  LOL just kidding... 

But really, I talk to my husband randomly throughout the day and talk to him before I go to bed each night.  We alwaaaaays used to talk...  If I were to stop now, it would really hurt me.  And again, I have no doubt he can hear me.  So, I say, if no one is watching (lol) and if it comforts you, then go for it.  ;) 

 

RE: The death of a spouse - in words

by mavcav on Fri Oct 04, 2013 04:21 AM

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I think talking to pets is great cuz they do understand more then we think.  When my husband and I had our dog, I talked to her a lot. One night I was sitting outside after my husband had gone to bed and it was really windy and I was really sad so I started talking to God.  I was speaking in just a whisper and I asked "Where are you, God?"  The dog had been laying on the lawn and she came right up to me on the porch for some loves.  Now, isn't that something?  I know they have great hearing, but with the wind, don't know how she could have heard me, but it more could have been she sensed that I was sad.  Anyhow, I talk to my husband a lot, but even to myself as I can't stand the silence and there are days if I didn't talk to myself, then my mouth wouldn't open except for food and drink. :(  Now you all must think I am crazy and maybe I am. lol

RE: The death of a spouse - in words

by karynk on Fri Oct 04, 2013 04:23 AM

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Oh the kitties understand me.  My old boy...he had some major issues after my husband went into the hospital, but those 2 were partners in crime.  My husband used to give the cat part of his turkey sandwich at lunch most days.  My kitty has neuro issues too.  Actually I had to rehab the cat from a spinal stroke aka teach the cat to walk again.  Then the hubby had his stroke 6 months later and I had to rehab him.  That I am not drooling in the corner of a padded room by now is some sort of miracle all it's own.

Oddly, tonight the kitten was obsessed with the corner of the living room.  I kept checking for bugs that might have gotten in the house - nothing.  He would jump off the couch, meow, and then just sit there stairing at the corner of the ceiling moving his tail.  weird!  My old kitty did that in our closest right after my husband died.

I had a whole conversation with my husband in the cemetery over the weekend about the cost of granite. LOL

RE: The death of a spouse - in words

by karynk on Fri Oct 04, 2013 04:24 AM

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and on a very, very odd note.  My older kitty....smells like my husband's cologne on a regular basis.

Now where's that rubber room again?

RE: The death of a spouse - in words

by mavcav on Fri Oct 04, 2013 04:31 AM

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Very interesting about your kitty tonight!  They sense things that we can't and I think it is great.  But, you just made me bust out laughing over your comment of drooling in the corner of a padded room!  Thanks so much for the great laugh as I sure needed one. :)

RE: The death of a spouse - in words

by karynk on Fri Oct 04, 2013 03:25 PM

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On Oct 04, 2013 4:31 AM mavcav wrote:

Very interesting about your kitty tonight!  They sense things that we can't and I think it is great.  But, you just made me bust out laughing over your comment of drooling in the corner of a padded room!  Thanks so much for the great laugh as I sure needed one. :)

Glad to provide a laugh for the evening!  :-)

RE: The death of a spouse - in words

by JackieJo on Fri Oct 04, 2013 06:35 PM

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Wow!!! I couldn't believe what I was reading!!! I do the same things that y'all are doing...and I thought I was turning into a full fledged loon!!! ;) Now I know that I'm not the only one that talks to my husband quite a few times a day and I also talk to my 3 dogs alot. I honestly feel much better after reading all of these posts knowing that I'm not the only one that talks to my deceased hubby...my dogs and even to myself at times. Either we are all losing it or we are all experiencing the normal process of grief. In all honestly...all kidding aside...I think it's a normal part of grieving to talk to our loved ones after they have passed over. After all....we spent many years together talking about anything and everything. I don't think its something we can give up doing after they pass. I usually feel better after a conversation with Joe. I want to feel that he hears everything that I say to him and I think he probably does. So I think we should all keep on doing what we're doing and continue talking with our spouses...and to ourselves and our precious pets!! If anyone askes it's our little secret!!! <3

mavcav...I do think your dog was prompted by a higher power when you asked "Where are you God" and your dog came up on the porch to give you some loves. Remember God spelled backwards is doG. Before you think that I'm crazy...if you don't already.... let me explain!!! I'm not saying dogs are God but I think that like the angels, dogs...and other pets...are messengers from God.

OK before I dig myself in deeper I'll sign off for now. :)

Holding you all close to my heart and in my continuing prayers.

Love and Prayers

JackieJo 

RE: The death of a spouse - in words

by mavcav on Fri Oct 04, 2013 09:58 PM

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JackieJo,

I think we are all just experiencing the normal process of grief, but boy are there times I truly think I am losing it! lol  Ya know, I thought about what you said on the dog being prompted by a higher power and it is possible.  Anything is possible I suppose.  No, I don't think you are crazy, but I did laugh over your thought on that. :)  Anyhow, I too agree with continuing to talk to our spouses, etc.  It doesn't hurt anything and if it helps, all the better. :)   mavcav

RE: The death of a spouse - in words

by SarahGrey on Sat Oct 05, 2013 12:50 AM

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The drooling comment made me laugh a bit too ;)  The best part is, I think we can truly even get away with just sitting in any corner while drooling and talking to "ourselves."  And if anyone says anything, we can just shout, "Leave me alone, I'm GRIEVING!"  LOL!  I think now, pretty much anything goes.  ;)

And yup, I completely believe that God told the pup to come over and "give a sign"  :)

Also, I agree with Mavcav's last point - that as long as it helps us, then we should do it.  :)

RE: The death of a spouse - in words

by eternalife on Sat Oct 05, 2013 01:31 AM

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Do you think we are all suffering from PTSD... that's why we have to talk it out...

I hate too much silence.. this site helps to get out the pain of having to live alone in the world called widowhood.

 

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