Depression, Stress, Loss

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RE: Depression, Stress, Loss

by Julie2015 on Tue Jun 23, 2015 02:54 PM

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Hi Stan,

So sorry to hear that you lost your beloved after 50 years, so tough.  I and my husband had almost 13 years together.

Yes, it has been difficult on me to since my husband's passing 9 days ago. 

Sounds like you will have great memories to keep in your heart.  Be strong. 

I have so many things I have to deal with now that he is gone, but like you said - that is the cost of love! 

I pray we both are able to make the best of our lives until we meet with our loved ones one day.

 

RE: Depression, Stress, Loss

by StanToronto on Wed Jun 24, 2015 12:06 AM

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Hi Julie!

From what I hear, it probably takes a year to get things back on track. :-(

I tend to believe that God leaves the strong one behind to take care of things. I can't even begin to imagine how horrific it would be for my buddy if she was the one left to clean everything up!

"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.

 To love is to be vulnerable."
? C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves

"If you love deeply, you're going to get hurt badly. But it's still worth it." 
? C.S. Lewis

RE: Depression, Stress, Loss

by tjvonblueberry on Wed Jun 24, 2015 02:31 AM

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Julie - My heart breaks for you.  I know how precious my husband is to me and I can't imagine living without him.  I am still struggling with losing my Mom one year ago to this dreaded disease.  She went from healthy, active, and on the go to gone in two months.  My head is still spinning and my heart still aches.  My thoughts and prayers for you and your family!

RE: Depression, Stress, Loss

by Julie2015 on Wed Jun 24, 2015 04:10 PM

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Your probably right - it will take at least a year to get things back on track.  I probably need to go to a group meeting with others who are experiencing what is happening with me.  I am at a loss at this time.  Got an urn and picking up my husband's ashes today.  :((((((

 

 

RE: Depression, Stress, Loss

by Julie2015 on Wed Jun 24, 2015 04:12 PM

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So sorry about the loss of your mother.  I lost my mother about 15 years ago, I spent 2 months with her in the hospital, so I know how hard it is losing a parent. 

Thank you for your prayers and I will be praying for you and your family also.  God bless you.

RE: Depression, Stress, Loss

by StanToronto on Wed Jun 24, 2015 06:08 PM

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On Jun 24, 2015 4:10 PM Julie2015 wrote:

Your probably right - it will take at least a year to get things back on track.  I probably need to go to a group meeting with others who are experiencing what is happening with me.  I am at a loss at this time.  Got an urn and picking up my husband's ashes today.  :((((((

 

 

Julie, I have found a whole lot of useful articles and You tube. Just search for "suffering", and you will find no end of helpful files. Not only that, but when listening to these videos, they are a great diversion to help take my mind off of my present distress.

RE: Depression, Stress, Loss

by Kjohnchas on Fri Jun 26, 2015 10:35 AM

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stan

i am so sorry for your loss.i dont come on c.c. too much anymore.just happened to today.my husband passed away on april 3rd the same day Angel did.

i thought i would be ok,now that he is no longer suffering.offcou rse im not,but know he is in heaven with God.

i too am trying to find my way and maybe go to a group as he was my life,and my best freind,i have no one to complain too,but his words come to me,like he is with me

again i am so sorry

                  kathy

RE: Depression, Stress, Loss

by Julie2015 on Fri Jun 26, 2015 02:12 PM

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Good morning Kathy:

I am so very sorry about the loss of your husband on April 3rd.  The suffering is gone for our departed loved ones, but we still suffer here on earth.

I never thought of going on You Tube to look up anything, but thank you Stan, I will go on You Tube later today when I get back from the Social Security Office. 

I feel lost and so alone without my husband, who was also my best friend, I of course also asked for his advice. He usually would leave my decisions up to me, but at least I was able to talk to him.  I guess now I better start looking in the mirror and talking to myself. (Just joking).

Like one other member said God leaves the stronger ones here to take care of things.

Loss is so difficult.  My husband may be out of my sight, but he will always be in my heart.  He was a good man and I miss him so much.

RE: Depression, Stress, Loss

by Kjohnchas on Sun Jun 28, 2015 10:53 AM

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Good morning Julie , I came 3 hrs away to see my sister ,with my 8 year old grandson, she doesn't have Internet so bear with my writing on my phone. It seems everyday is hard. I miss talking to chuck. I write to him every nite but I think I might try the mirror thing lol he lived for this grandson, they were always together as he lives with us, so I am forced to keep moving. It's been almost 3 months but what really kept me going is preparing a memorial in our yard under the lilac trees that is beautiful and we buried him there on May 19th, as that was his moms birthday. I did keep some in a urn in my bedroom.im sure it will get better but I will always miss him being by my side, the little things like if I went to fold clothes he would say leave that and come sit with me, course I did, but now I think of that. God was by his side a long time, and still is as he passed peaceful, just went to sleep, I thank him everyday for that. Bless you kathy

RE: Depression, Stress, Loss

by Julie2015 on Sun Jun 28, 2015 03:17 PM

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Happy Sunday. Good moring Kathy.  Glad you have your grandson with you, your a great grandmother taking care of your grandson.  How nice doing a memorial for your husband.  Lilac trees - I haven't seen any lilac trees since I was on the east coast. They have the best fragrance in the world.  I also love lily of the valley - but tried to grown them on the west coast - they did not survive.

Sounds like you have such wonderful memories of your husband, my husband also passed peacefully after the breathing tube was removed.

God bless you and yes keep moving and doing things, your husband would want that.  They do not want us to be unhappy.

 

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