Terminal lung cancer

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Terminal lung cancer

by Maxdeakin on Wed Jul 08, 2015 12:33 PM

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My husband was admitted to hospital end of June 2014 after weeks of pain in his hip, he was 49. Several days later we were told he had lung cancer, we were in total shock, the cancer had destroyed his hip. He went through a full hip replacement and came home using crutches just days later. He never complained but would not talk to me about the cancer. I have not talked to anyone properly about it all yet as I can't. But he died on10th September 2014! I was with him, I love and miss him so much and after ten months I can't begin to deal with his loss, I push it all away and I'm struggling. His was the only cancer I've ever known and i can't begin to come to terms with how it cruelty took him away, I never want to see it ever again. It's left me so scared.....of everything. Please could anyone advise.

RE: Terminal lung cancer

by carrieg55 on Wed Jul 08, 2015 03:05 PM

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Maxdeakin,

I am so sorry for your loss that was a lot to take in for such a short amount of time. On the message board we have a bereavement board my suggestion is for you to look at the posts there, we have all lost a loved one in the bereavement group wether it be a spouse, mother, father, child.....

What I have found about the bereavement posts is that everyone had the same feelings as I did we were all on the same path, the same journey, it was good to know that I was not going crazy and what I was feeling was a normal part of the grieving process.

There are people of all ages there hopefully you can connect and identify with the others who either just lost a loved one or is a little farther down the road.

My heart goes out to you I lost my husband to stage 4 lung cancer May of 2014 I know the heartbreak you are feeling I am sending you a cyber hug.

Another suggestion is if you could contact your nearest hospice group they have bereavement groups and counselors it is free I did attend and I can say it helped me I also met a friend there she lives close to my house she was a lifesaver for me, we cried together, went out to dinner, shopping etc., it helped to fill the empty hours and the loneliness I was feeling,  it helped us both we could talk and she knew exactly what I was feeling she was feeling the same thing to.

There is a book that also will help it is called "Second Firsts" by Christina Rasmussen.

I am hoping that this will help you to work through your grief.

Carrie

RE: Terminal lung cancer

by sandy26 on Tue Aug 18, 2015 04:29 PM

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I am so sorry to hear about your husband. Life just seems so unfair. We just found out my husband has NSCLC stage 4. He has had one round of chemo and gets another this week. He can't breathe or talk. He is losing weight and is weak and tired. I know cancer I lost my dad to cancer 6 years ago. It is a dreadful disease. My husband and I just retired and have 2 grandbabies we love. They are only 3 & 2 years old and they love their grandpa dearly. This is a nightmare. I am praying for a miracle. I hope you find the love and support you need to deal with your husband's passing. Just remember the good times and rememeber you will be with him again someday.

Sandy

RE: Terminal lung cancer

by Maxdeakin on Tue Aug 18, 2015 08:58 PM

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My heart is going out to you, I know the road you have ahead of you and it's really hard, I'm no closer at all coming to terms with my husbands loss, Iv started bereavement council img hoping it can help. But as yet I can't begin to deal with what happened to my soul mate, so lonely for him still, sending love and hugs your way, hope you feel that you can reply to me ...

RE: Terminal lung cancer

by lharrell22250 on Thu Aug 20, 2015 09:34 PM

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Bad things happen to good people.  My husband has a diagnosis of stage IV small cell lung cancer.  He did well initially but yesterday we were told his pancreatic tail is full of metastasis.  I was in such a state of fear and very severe anxiety.  I will pray for you.  Try to put your faith in God because he will never leave you.  It has only been 10 months since you lost him, so you are, of course, struggling mightily. I wonder how on earth I will cope when my husband passes away because he is my rock.  I have no family so I will not have anyone to speak to about my suffering.  The one thing I try to remember is that there are millions, yes millions of people going through what you and I are going through.  We are not the only ones. You will miss your husband until the end of time, and that is natural and normal.  I have lost two people I worshiped from cancer, those in addition to my possibly losing my husband to his lung cancer. Hang on. 

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