How is everyone doing??- update please

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RE: How is everyone doing??- update please

by bobss396 on Mon Dec 14, 2015 02:15 PM

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I am hanging in there, at the 1.5 year mark as of yesterday. Did some things around the yard that would have made Barbara happy, trimmed bushes and the boys helped with the Xmas lights.

Putting on a 2nd holiday season without her and it feels as rough as last year. But I have people around to help. I will probably never like the holidays ever again, not that I was big on them in the first place. Can't want for 1/1/16 to roll around.

RE: How is everyone doing??- update please

by carrieg55 on Mon Dec 14, 2015 03:04 PM

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Hello Everyone,

Something told me to come on and check the site I have not been on in months, I stopped coming on the site after about the 14th month of Jimmy's passing I felt I was not moving forward I was stuck, I am happy to report I am no longer stuck and have been moving on with life.....even dating.....yep believe it.....I can hardly believe it myself!

I have so much to tell and so much has happened I hardly know where to begin. My daughter and two grandsons ( 11 & 14) and grand dog have moved in with me, they have been here since June 1st, my daughter has seperated from her husband who lives back in the North and wants to start a new life so here she is starting over again.

It has been quite an adjustment they are planning on getting there own place after she files her taxes, the good thing is I never felt alone after they came this house was so lonely and emtpy after Jimmy passed I do think they have helped with part of the healing process.

I have been dating this man since July 25th we are both from the North I don't know how I moved from the big windy city to a small town that is heavily populated with seniors to meet someone who is my age and from the same town and knows many of the places back home......he even worked in the same place one of my brothers worked at in the 70's for 5 years they don't know each other though........

He has been a God send in many ways my home is now 12 years old things are starting to break, he has fixed my ice maker, rebuilt my deck, we have relandscaped, changed a door lock, fixed a door that wasn't shutting, changed a faucet.....etc....the list goes on.....I don't like him just because he has jumped in and helped when things have gone wrong I like spending time with him, he is fun, we have fun together, we laugh, we joke, he is my friend, someone I can confide in, we talk, watch tv, we have a lot in common.......he has filled many lonely hours.....not sure where this is going ....time will tell........

I am working part time for a departement store, I also do home health care Tuesdays and Thursdays I basically sit with a woman who has alzheimers it gives her husband some time out away from home,  anyone who has ever taken care of a loved one with dementia/alzheimers knows that respite care is important for the caretaker you can burn out so quickly.

We actually put a tree up, I wanted to do it for the grandsons and my daughter, I haven't put the tree up in years it feels different this year.

I think about you all and the struggles we have been through I pray that each and everyone is on the road to recovery.

I went to a wake yesterday, a nurse I worked with just lost her mom to cancer she had been battling breast cancer since 2010 she finally lost her battle, I know the journey of grieving is just beginning for them I told her I am here for her even if it is just to talk, my heart goes out to her. One of my cousins lost her 11 year old grandson they live in TN we only see each other at family reunions or a brief hello on FB, losing a child has to be the worst kind of loss there is I cannot imagine I am keeping them in prayer.

The losses will continue......I pray for comfort for the families and loved ones.

Wishing you all a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!


RE: How is everyone doing??- update please

by StanToronto on Mon Dec 14, 2015 06:26 PM

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Bobss>> "Did some things around the yard that would have made Barbara happy, trimmed bushes and . . . "

I do stuff like that too. After the 50 years it took for her to train me, I often think: "How would Ethel do that?" and that's a comforting way of honouring her memory, not to mention, it often provides me with a happy giggle when I do it her way. And she was such an avid gardener. I tried to look after her flower gardens when she was sick, but there was just no enough energy left over to do that. When Spring comes I am going to try again. And when I see all the beautiful flowers everyday, they will remind me of something she really loved.

Although I hosted Thanksgiving, and it went well, Christmas is a whole 'nuther matter. Although it has only been six months, and I was doing well, sorting through the Christmas decorations, and hearing Christmas Carols has set me back about 3 months. Nevertheless, I am determined to beat this, and have chosen to host Christmas Dinner for 11 people.

As for 1/1/16, be prepared. It might not be what you expect. Ethel always read Daily Bread, and as I looked through the January selections, January 5 was titled "The Lonely Season." :-(  

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