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kjohnchas's Message Board Messages

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RE: Dreading the Holidays

by Kjohnchas - November 24, 2015

thank you clint////////// i do remeber your story.just not the naked part lol.you are such a blessig always clint.thank you.......kathy

RE: Dreading the Holidays

by Kjohnchas - November 20, 2015

Its been 7 months for me,things dont seem to get any easier,i just feel like my life doesnt have any meaning anymore.i have no desire for family time for the holidays,i will work in the morning and go to my freinds house for dinner.chuck and i always did the cooking together,and i just cant this year anyway.

i meet with hospice grief group one a week,and we meet at duncan donuts,and go for lunch once a month,this is helpful.though its not the same.i have no energy to do much of anything,they say that will come back,but it hasnt yet.

wildrose,im so happy for you

God bless everyone     kathy

RE: He's gone

by Kjohnchas - October 07, 2015

meah1

i am so sorry,i dont come on much but know what you are going through.a peaceful ending is the best.my heart goes out to you,cause it sure dont get easy.God bless kathy

i did find it thankyou

Stan.... i suppose i do feel this way..but everyday is a new day,and everyday i see my blessings,and try and find a purpose to go on

i went to a new church yesterday,one closer to me in my own town,everyone was so nice,and afterwards they had a church picnic that i stayed for.they have a womans meeting on thursday morning that i think i will attend.its a much smaller church and the paster has time to talk with you.there also is a revival fri night to pray for our country,he mentioned a judgement coming and as we all know prayer helps,

i am going to try and forget my myself and not worry about things i have no control over.i just dont understand why everyone in our world doesnt treat everyone in love.where do i read about davids exsperience? i cant seem to find it.

i dont really worry about myself so much ,its more about my family.

hi

my husbnd chuck has been gone 5 months now.at first i was ok because after a 30 month struggle with pancreas cancer,and because he fought so hard to live,i know he has no pain now.but it wasnt always bad,we had time to enjoy and be thankful for our time.

but here i am with my family that dont really get it.the visitors have gone away,the step children,step grandkids have gone away after 22 years of being a family,all because they wanted something i wasnt ready to part with after he was gone 2 months.i dont understand because he wouldnt of wanted it like this.

the kids dont tex me,how are you today,anymore,they just feel im miserable,and i am,and im sad and trying to find a new life.i was so busy taking care of him and just dont know what to do now.i have grandkids to take care of everyday ,but still feel empty.

ive been going to a hospice couselor,and that helps,sept 15th i will attend a group.i hope to meet others like me.and starting a once a month dinner get together sounds great.

ive been on this great site for years,i just havent been able to wtite since chuck passed,feel i have nothing to offer except my complaining.though everyday i thank God for my blessings,and for the time he gave me with my husband.

       God bless everyone

                      kathy

Stan

     I know exactly what your talking about,i too need to find new meaning,but not sure how to do that.my family also are supportive,but because they live here and see me everyday,it upsets them cause im not happy happy.

i am 61 and chuck was 71 and until the cancer hit him he had more ambition than a 20 year old.

my sister is visiting and that helps as she lost her husband 5 years ago,and she says you just have to greive at your own pace.

i have my faith but forget to let go and let GOD everyday.but im workig on it.most days i just want to be with chuck.

thinking of you and praying for peace

kathy

stan....i read this book,i couldnt put it down,maybe i should read it again,as what you saw in this,i didnt see.

do i miss my life,i do so much.i know chuck is happy but i am just so sad all the time and just feel lost.someti mes people reply like they care but most times thy dont

RE: Update. .

by Kjohnchas - July 25, 2015

tom.....im so happy for you.i wish only the best for you.i dont get on here much anymore,but my grandson and i still pray everynight for everyone.

          GOD BLESS   kathy

Good morning Julie , I came 3 hrs away to see my sister ,with my 8 year old grandson, she doesn't have Internet so bear with my writing on my phone. It seems everyday is hard. I miss talking to chuck. I write to him every nite but I think I might try the mirror thing lol he lived for this grandson, they were always together as he lives with us, so I am forced to keep moving. It's been almost 3 months but what really kept me going is preparing a memorial in our yard under the lilac trees that is beautiful and we buried him there on May 19th, as that was his moms birthday. I did keep some in a urn in my bedroom.im sure it will get better but I will always miss him being by my side, the little things like if I went to fold clothes he would say leave that and come sit with me, course I did, but now I think of that. God was by his side a long time, and still is as he passed peaceful, just went to sleep, I thank him everyday for that. Bless you kathy
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About kjohnchas

Pancreatic Cancer
After Treatment, Cancer Nutrition, Cancer Treatments, Chemotherapy

I am caregiver to my husband chuck DX with neuroendocrine tumor in oct 2012,treatment of chimo and radiation,at ctca in Philly,which we thank God we found,I've been on CC since this journey started. We have 5 kids,14 grand kids and 3 great grandkids

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